Appendices of resources
Appendix A - Making an initial call to a bereaved family
Useful Educational Psychology resources
Appendix B- Useful websites and links re bereavement, loss and trauma
Websites providing support for loss and bereavement:
- Sudden death - Supporting people after sudden death including COVID-19.
- Grief Encounter - Helpline and support for bereaved children and their families.
- Child Bereavement UK - Supports families and educates professionals when a baby or child of any age dies or is dying, or when a child is facing bereavement. Provides a helpline.
- Child Breavement UK - Resources to equip pupils with coping skills for bereavement, now and in later life.
- Child Bereavement UK - Supporting students
- Winston’s Wish - Help line, information, advice and guidance for supporting bereaved children and young people. Has information specific to coronavirus (COVID-19) including how to day goodbye when a funeral is not possible.
- CRUSE - Support, advice and information to children, young people and adults when someone dies. There’s a section for schools https://www.cruse.org.uk/get-help/for-schools
- Samaritans
- Papyrus
Appendix C - Information for parents and links re grief and trauma
There is information on the Warwickshire County Council website about organisations that can support families of bereaved children
Appendix D - Example scripts for telling children and young people about a death
Template scripts are provided below, with thanks to Winston’s Wish and the National Educational Psychological Service (NEPS). Before using these scripts, please ensure you establish exactly what information can and cannot be shared with pupils/students, as in the majority of cases, the names and hospital locations of injured people would not usually be released.
Use simple, honest age-appropriate language, explain that the person has died. Talk a little about how they died, whether by an accident (i.e. “he was knocked down by a car and taken to hospital, but sadly he was too badly hurt and he died”) or through an illness (i.e. “Mr Smith was very ill on Saturday – his heart stopped working properly. We need our hearts to make the blood go around our bodies. Although the doctors tried very hard to make Mr Smith’s heart work again, it didn’t work and Mr Smith died because his heart stopped working. This is called a ‘heart attack’ or a ‘cardiac arrest’”).
“I’ve got some really sad news to tell you today that might upset you. I know most of you will have heard of cancer, and know that sometimes people with cancer get better, but other times people die from it. Mrs Smith, the Geography teacher and Year 11 tutor, has been ill with cancer for a long time. I have to tell you that Mrs Smith died yesterday in hospital”.
“Sometimes people have accidents at work, at home, at school or on the road. People may be hurt or injured in the accident and they may have to go to hospital for treatment. Sadly, there are some accidents that cause people to die. I have some really sad news to tell you that might upset you. Yesterday Stephen, who is in Year 4, was in an accident and he was so badly injured that he died”.
“Some students from our school have been involved in a road traffic accident. Some deaths have occurred and some are injured. Those who have died are................... The injured are.....................They are being treated in.................... There are.......who are very seriously injured, and others are ok, but are being checked out by medical staff. We are getting information on an ongoing basis and will let you know if there is anything important you need to know. Please be careful to stick to the facts and not to engage in spreading rumours about injuries or further deaths. This could be very distressing for others, especially if not accurate. I understand that this information might be very upsetting so if you would like to talk to someone about this further, you should…”.
Appendix E - example letters to inform parents
GLOUCESTER C OF E PRIMARY SCHOOL
<Date>
Dear Parents
Your child’s class teacher had the sad task of informing the children of the tragic death of <Name>, who has been a teacher at this school for years. Our thoughts are with <Name‘s> family at this time and in an effort to try and respond to his/her death in a positive manner, all children have been informed. The children were told that <Name> died from an asthma attack on <Date>. A number of pupils have been identified as being asthmatic and <Name>, the School Nurse has today reassured them that it is unusual for a person to die from asthma. When someone dies, their family and friends have lots of feelings - sadness, anger, and confusion - which are all normal. The children have been told that their teachers are willing to try and answer their questions at school, but I have made available some information which may help you to answer your child’s questions as they arise. You can obtain this from the school office.
Yours sincerely
Head teacher
© Winston’s Wish
<Name> Head teacher GLOUCESTER C OF E PRIMARY SCHOOL
<Date>
Dear Parents
Your child’s tutor had the sad task of informing the children of the death of <Name>, a pupil in <Year>.
They were told that <name> died from an illness called cancer. Sometimes people who have cancer can get better, but other times people die from it. <Name> had been ill with cancer for a long time and died at home yesterday.
When someone dies, their family and friends have lots of feelings of sadness, anger, and confusion - these are all normal. The children have been told that their teachers are willing to try and answer their questions at school, but I have made available some information which may help you to answer your child’s questions as they arise. You can obtain this from the school office.
Yours sincerely
<Name> Head teacher
© Winston’s Wish
Appendix F - How ages and stage of development effect understanding of death
Child Bereavement UK - Children's understanding of death at different ages